September 30th

Looking at my hit counter, around 5 people read the Journals between me posting my tip on Friday (28th) and Saturday's games; I'd be interested to know if anyone had any joy with Arbroath (they won 3-2 at East Stirlingshire). I planned to have Arbroath, Liverpool and Man U but swapped Man U for Watford at the last minute- gutted.

The full story behind the tip is that the brother of a chap at work (how many times do story's start like this?) works for an independent bookie who, allegedly, has a few high profile clients who owe him cash. As an ongoing arrangement, allegedly, these contacts will tip him off with insider knowledge. Not match fixing but team news, injuries, flu epidemics and the like. The example he gave was when one these people was in a managerial/ coaching post and rang the bookie to tell him the team in question (his team) had injuries and illness and had six men out. My mates brother rang him with the advice "put yer bollocks on it" and sure enough the afflicted team lost 3-1. Unfortunately, the Observer doesn't print the line-up's for the Scottish third division so I was unable to check if East Stirlingshire had Bruce Grobbelaar in nets. (Checking the spelling on Wikipedia I see that Bruce is 50 next week, Blimey! that makes me feel old).

September 30th

Text received yesterday:

"Half page advert in the Mirror yesterday advertising pay on the day for todays [Birmingham] match against Manu U. No wonder the Golds want out"

The novelty of the Premier League hasn't lasted long there has it? Last year Birmingham blamed their poor crowds on the quality of the opposition (the away fans probably thought the same) but what's the excuse this year? For the record, the crowd was about 3-4,000 below capacity.

Another story in the Daily Mirror claimed that Billy Davies had tried to hype up the players before the Arsenal match by blasting out Tupac in the dressing room. I don't claim to be an expert on Tupac and have only heard some of his pop-rap tracks on the radio sampling Bruce Hornsby and Elton John; which leads to one of two scenarios 1) Billy is trying to motivate the players with a rap/piano combination or 2) Billy is a sufficient connoisseur of Tupac to pick out some darker, harder tracks. I'm sure we'd have beaten Arsenal comfortably with the right music.

September 28th

For anyone reading this before Saturday afternoon likely to have a coupon; I received a "red hot" tip today- Arbroath to win at East Stirlingshire. Don't put your mortgage on it but at 10/11 it might be worth adding to your line. This came from the chap who won a load on East Fife et al a couple of weeks ago and is supposed to be "insider knowledge" rather than his own analysis. (East Stirling lost 6-0 v. bottom of the league last week so something may be afoot).

September 26th

It's hardly radical to say that there's a lot nonsense bandied about in forums but I stumbled across something today bordering on the bizarre. It started out when I saw that ex-Rams striker Marvin Robinson had joined yet another team so decided to have a look how many he'd played for (13 in about 7 years). What I found was a thread on a Port Vale forum (one of the few teams Marv hasn't played for) discussing him. Apparently 34.84% voters thought Marvin was "alright" and 26.3% "absolute shite". Someone then describes him as a "blacky" and a big anti-racism debate ensues (inevitably). I can only guess that Vale might have been linked with him at some point. I wonder if Marvellous Marvin is aware of these discussions in a tiny corner of cyberspace?

Onto another subject- during the summer the Telegraph reported that 15 year old Jordon Mutch had left Derby's Academy for Birmingham's (thanks, or no thanks, to Terry Westley). At that time I thought the story was a bit of a space filler but keep your eyes peeled for the name- he's in Birmingham's first team squad tonight for the Carling Cup and could be their youngest ever debutant.

(2 minutes after writing this from the BBC website-"Football Association rules have prevented Birmingham from picking 15-year-old Jordon Mutch in their squad as he's too young. You have to be at least 16." The rules must have changed since Lee Holmes made his debut).

September 24th

Reports in today's paper (quoting yesterday's paper) claim that investors are trying to buy the Rams for £30 million (the Telegraph says "a figure of £30m for what is currently a Premier League club appears low". I think the use of the word "currently" in this sentence suggests some pessimism at the Telegraph).

A rise in value from £3 to £30m in about three years is some financial turnaround, just how JK probably imagined it- unfortunately for him, he's not around to get £10m for his solitary golden nugget. Altogether now- "Here's what you could have won!"

September 23rd

In light of recent results, I was absolutely gutted at Saturday tea-time. How did Liverpool not beat Birmingham? I had what I thought was a great value bet (Sheff Wed and Stoke both to win at home, both above evens) and thought I'd chuck Liverpool on the end to win an extra fiver. No value but after our demolition at Anfield I thought Liverpool had stopped dropping points like this.

Simon was in today's Observer sharing his thoughts on the game; anyone who has spoken to him about football for more than two minutes would probably agree that his insights have been worthy of a national stage for years! I hope Stephen Bywater isn't a reader though after Simon labelled him "chocolate wrists" in the paper for his habit of getting two hands on the ball but failing to keep it out the net. Stephen, if you want his address I'm sure I could find it in exchange for a few match tickets and a replica shirt- don't sign it thanks.

Bob was in the Emirates hospitality, his afternoon summarised as "had several scoops before the game...boss had to keep me in check when I was brandishing "virtual yellow card" at Adebayor". I hope he cleared up his empties and bottle tops afterwards. 

September 22nd

Text from Bob re: the September 19th entry:

"That multi coloured bust was expensive as well, you'd have needed 1 of the bets to have come in! I enjoyed clearing up countless empties and tops when I got in anyway".

September 21st

Quick, someone phone Sky Sports! Someone has been discovered in a remote area of the Peak District  who Sky are yet ask about Jose Mourinho's departure.

September 19th

I had every faith in us winning on Monday night, so much so that I told anyone who'd listen at work what a good bet we were (9/2 to win). After chatting to a colleague about it, he convinced me that if I really must bet on the Rams, Derby to be winning at half time would be the best bet. The logic being that if we were to take the lead, it would be from a first half frenzy and the odds would probably be better anyway. Coming from man who won a couple of hundred quid last week on a line including Dundee and East Fife, I thought I should temper my optimism with some of his pragmatism. I went on-line in the afternoon and after getting bombarded by all the "match specials" I had 4 bets: Draw Half Time- Derby Full-Time; Derby to win 2-0; Derby to score a penalty (why?); Derby Half time-Draw Full-Time. I won a grand total of £0. Whatever happened to a simple home win?

I ended up watching the game with the Jackal on Setanta; not the best coverage. I offered to "accidentally" destroy one of Rockin' Bob's ornaments if we scored (mutual friend and Jackals landlord) but by the time I could dive headlong into his multi-coloured headless bust mosaic lamp, the goal had been and gone. Sentanta were too busy showing Leacock having a man-tangle with a Newcastle defender. At least the lamp (and therefore my Bolton ticket) remained in tact.

(Only joking Bob of course, I wouldn't have risked electrocution and shrapnel injuries at the same time)

September 16th

The Observer coverage of the Hull match reads "[a Jay-Jay Okocka run]...led to David Livermore making it 1-1from Fagan's flick on".

Did I imagine the last year? Was he on a "try before you buy" deal? Or did this reporter just think he'd been injured for a while?

September 14th

Driving past Pride Park this afternoon I saw a billboard advertising the Newcastle game with a picture of Earnshaw and the strap-line "Earnie your stripes" the pun being the addidas stripes on his shoulder and the Newcastle kit (in case you needed that pointing out!). Surely a better one would have been Private Earnshaw sat atop his Hummer in combat fatigues with the same strap-line, possibly pointing some military hardware at Michael Owen.

September 14th

An interesting story on the Derby Telegraph website today: apparently touts are trying to sell tickets for the Newcastle game online for £203. The last time I looked, the club had downgraded the game from "Gold" to "Silver" and knocked nearly a tenner off the price of a ticket. At the time of writing tickets are still available at about thirty quid. I'm no economist but the laws of supply and demand aren't working here.

The Telegraph goes on to write about how despicable a practice this is and that the tickets are being supplied by Rams season ticket holders. The Telegraph then lists all the sites involved complete with hyperlinks. "If you've bought a season ticket and are feeling disappointed, just click here to punt your ticket on for a huge profit"* The Telegraph should get commission.

*The Telegraph didn't print this, legal eagles, it's just what some cynics might think.

On a serious note, I wonder if this is why season tickets sold out so quickly? You could buy a season ticket for about £400. A seat for a sold out game could quite easily be sold for £100+ to any number of people: a Geordie or Mackem as above who missed out on the first 3,000; a Surrey based Man U fan with no legitimate means of getting a ticket; a "one game a season" neutral with a bit of cash wanting to see Chelsea or Arsenal; and the ultimate enemy- those born and living within the city walls whose allegiances lie elsewhere ("I've supported them since I was a kid" they claim; you also used to wet the bed and wear teddy bear romper suits- do you still do that? Well, grow up then). It wouldn't take many games to make a profit.

September 12th

What a dull couple of weeks it's been with the double whammy of the transfer window closing and an international break. It's got to the point where I can't even be bothered to look on the internet at lunch whereas only a fortnight ago I couldn't wait. There's only so much I want to know about Gerrard's toe and Healy's calf- which is not a lot in the first place. I spied the Derby Telegraph in someone's bag at work today and thought I'd have a quick look- things are so quiet that the back page headlines were about Emile Heskey and Gerald Mortimer didn't give one comment or opinion on The Rams in his weekly pageful of sport.

I nearly had a story at the weekend but not quite. Whilst queuing up at Sainsbury's, I glanced across the checkouts to see David Jones with his trolley full of goodies (meaning I've seen him more than the average Rams fan this season). As we were leaving around the same time I kept him in the corner of my eye. I approached my vehicle and started to unpack, noticing that parked next to me in the mother and baby section was a massive 4x4. Looking over my other shoulder, I saw Mr. Jones ambling towards me (no children or pushchairs in tow). Surely not? I thought. He then stopped and stood. I looked around again- he was still there. If I was the Premiership footballer in this scene I probably would have said to him "yeah, yeah, it's me, get over it". Then it dawned on him that his car was parked a couple of rows along. So off he went to his perfectly normal car, no 4x4, no illegal parking, no scandal- a non-story in a slow news week..

September 9th

It looks like indie fashion has finally reached the mainstream with Ian Wright appearing on Match of the Day wearing cardigan, jeans and dessert boots. The daffodils for his back pocket are on order for Wednesday. 

September 8th

Apparently our football consultant is working for BBC Scotland today. When he was appointed it was said a key part of his role would be to strengthen our hand in the world transfer market. If this is what he does on international weekend, is it any wonder we've got so many Scots in the squad now?

September 7th

Eh, ow ya daein? Sorry, just been doing Burley Column.

The Rams bandwagon now seems to have done a definite u-turn. Firstly, we had unknown "Rams fans" coming out of the woodwork (promotion time), then we had a retreat and silence (indifferent start) and now we have a new breed of hitherto unknown football experts coming out the woodwork with "Derby are crap" and the likes. Now hits are up and my anonymity is not as good as it was, I have to be a bit careful; but I'll give you a couple of examples:

First off, someone who made a comment intended as a joke but was outright offensive after a mate started a sentence by saying "we're all big Derby fans". The person who made the comment had tried to obtain play-off tickets, enjoyed an all-dayer on play-off final day and celebrated the promotion harder than most. Enthusiasm followed by derision usually reserved for an quickly forgotten final of X-Factor (careful what you wish for marketeers).

The second relatively innocuous but I daresay common; someone admiring my young son saying "don't grow up to support Derby County they're rubbish", a comment unlikely to have been made if we were half way up the Championship and below the mainstream radar.

I did actually unearth a new Rams fan at work who declared himself after the Tottenham debacle. However, when I said "shocking result Saturday wasn't it?" he replied "how did they get on, I didn't catch it?" This was Friday. I suppose he doesn't really count.

To quote C Spaceram in the Barometer "It's been a shocking start and the squad has hardly been transformed in the manner we were told it would be. However there's no point moaning about it, the lads need us more than ever so we say keep the faith and lets turn it round." Couldn't have said it better myself.

September 3rd

So Paddy Power are paying out on The Rams being relegated already? A cheap publicity stunt if ever there was one. Firstly, how many people would have placed an odds-on single bet that they couldn't collect for 9 months? I would imagine the amount of money involved was significantly less than paid-for advertising space in any of the papers covering the story. If big money was involved, any business would sit on it for 9 months for cash flow or even the interest (paying it off usually!).

So what if the unexpected happens and The Rams stay up? Will Mr. Patrick Power be weeping in his Guinness? No he'll be rubbing his hands at another round of free publicity so he will.

September 2nd

Another Saturday when I'll avoid dwelling on the game, only to say that losing away to Liverpool, however heavily, isn't going to get you relegated- unless it's last game of the season and you need a win to stay up. A bit of laughter in the dark was provided by the Observer; writing about Robert Malcolm (sic) the report read "...his bald pate went crimson for the mistake that gave Torres a second Premiership goal".  I'm sure the forums are alive with debate about team selection and tactics and I thought Billy missed a trick which could have helped- he should have asked Earnshaw to park his Hummer on the goal-line behind Bywater.

Preston have also had a shocking start and Simmo has attributed it to a most unusual source- Preston's choice of running out music. Now this may sound odd but picture the scene: Preston v. Colchester, probably not a huge crowd; Preston have had an indifferent start and the players need all the backing the crowd can give them. So what comes blaring out the Deepdale PA as the teams take to the field? UB40's reggae-lite version of Elvis ballad "Wise Men Say". Preston's players shuffle on and Colchester roll them over 3-0. "The song has to go" said Simmo "You need a buzz when the players come running out. We have to get the place rocking".

August 30th

Music news from the Jackal:

"Went to the reserves last night...I'd say about a 1000 people there....Steve Bloomer's watching followed by de de de de Stevie Howard at 1000 decibals before the game, at half time, when they came out for the 2 half, and at the end of the game."

August 28th

Email received today:

"The Hummer belongs to Robert Earnshaw. Saw him struggling to dismount the beast before the Portsmouth game ( I doubt stepladders are included in the price.)"

I'm glad I solved this one before I'd gone through the whole team, got a restraining order and had all the inconvenience of that.

Aside from driving a Monster Truck, another way of looking macho would be to go on Match of The Day and Sky Sports, rough up some defenders and score loads of goals. A somersault afterwards would be a nice touch as well.

August 27th

Text received today:

"Uncle seen giles at eastwood v ilson town this afternoon. Drives a porsche 4x4. We'll soon know who drives that hummer with this process of elimination in force".

This came after an earlier text regarding a sighting of Pearo in a 3 litre Audi.

Onto other news, I see Yakubu has had his work permit application turned down on the eve of his move to Everton. Evidently his marriage didn't work out (see Journals of August 13th for full work permit moan). 

August 27th

In times of adversity, there's sometimes nothing better than having a cheap dig at someone. So here we go: Vincent Pericard- this is your life.

Stoke's ex-Juventus striker Vincent Pericard was recently jailed for 4 months after the ex-Juventus man lied about a speeding offence (claimed his father-in-law was driving. His father in law hasn't been in Britain for years). Did I mention he used to play for Juventus? The Juventus link is a curious one which seems to have served Big Vinny well over the years. His salary was revealed during the trial to be £190,000 a year; not bad for a fella who has never scored double figures in a season nor even a top flight goal.

So what was Pericard's Juventus career all about? After a quick search, I soon discovered it consisted of less than half an hour in a "dead rubber" Champions League match watched by 8,500 in Turin. It's likely Pericard tried to swap shirts with his own players after the match. Tie-up's, shin pads and jock straps infused with the sweat of Juve players appeared on ebay hours after the match- probably. In short, the sort of career that makes David Jones feel aggrieved that he didn't get a testimonial at Man Utd.

The reason I find this of interest is that a few years ago I read a book about a chap who followed Liechtenstein, at one point their 'keeper had the chance to sign for Juve but didn't because it was widely believed that Juve sign any old youngster in the knowledge that they can milk the added value of the Juve connection in the transfer market. "Does this really happen?" I wondered. I don't know if this is the case with Pericard but imagine this scenario: he plays 2 games for Saint Etienne and is then signed  by Juve (true). After his life changing half an hour the ruse is well under way, all that is needed is someone to sign him. Where would you go? Pericard signs for Harry Redknapp's Portsmouth shortly after. Co-incidence or not, you can guarantee that his career earnings to date out strip his pie-munching more effective colleague at Stoke- Jon Parkin, who carries the less glamorous pre-fix of "ex-Macclesfield".

August 26th

The less said about yesterdays game the better, a classic case of a good day being ruined by 90 minutes in the middle. One minute we were sitting in the sunshine drinking Belgian strawberry beer and having a good laugh then bundling out of a taxi on Pride Park feeling a great sense of joie de vivre; moments later I was sitting in the East Stand thinking- "I'm in the same stand, watching the same two teams as this time last year- but this time it's cost me forty quid. Now the Premiership hype has subsided, the emperors new clothes are revealed...and it's a Birmingham City shirt". By the time I'd finished this psychobabble we were 1-0 down.

After my comments about the cars parked outside the ground a couple of weeks ago, there was apparently a few people taking photo's of the vehicles on display (not because of my piece, I'm sure I'm a latecomer to the sport of car-spotting). The vehicle of the week was definitely a huge "Hummer" which I suggested was a crime against the environment; the Jackal said it was at least a crime against good taste. I've no idea who the owner is but maybe they could put it to good use and check out some of Iraq's Asia Cup winning squad? Another point of note was the empty "Football Consultant" bay. We could certainly have done with some consultation on Saturday; hopefully Craig was discovering an undiscovered genius somewhere.

I believe Steve Howard also had the honour of joining Simon's self proclaimed "stalkers gallery" on his phone. This includes amongst others- Brian Lara, Dean Saunders and the drummer from the Futureheads.

August 23rd

With Bolton languishing at the bottom of the league (I'm getting this in about someone just in case I don't get chance for a while) and Diouf and Anelka seemingly on the way, I'm sure it won't be long before people are questioning the appointment of Sammy Lee. It wouldn't be the first coach or assistant manager to step up and fail (remember Les Reed anyone?). After an intense summer of study (reading the autobiography's of Niall Quinn, Lars Leese and Stan Ternant by the pool) my mate Simon has the following the theory on the matter: the coach is generally the class joker, leading the club farting competitions and the like. Then one day, he puts a suit on and starts asking people to turn up on time- it just doesn't work.

An example he gave was from Lars Leese book (ex-Barnsley German 'keeper during their brief spell in the Premiership). One minute cheeky chappie John Hendrie was arriving late of the team coach clutching a bag full of McDonald's, the next minute he was manager (he was a player at the time but an internal appointment nonetheless). A graph showing Barnsley's fortunes would show a downward trend for approximately eight years after that episode.

August 22nd

It seems Dean Sturridge remains undeterred in his ambition to emulate his hero Ian Wright. After failing to break the Arsenal goalscoring record, or indeed sign for them in the first place, Studger has now embarked on a media career as a co-commentator on Radio Derby. I initially thought Studger would be as suited to radio work about as well as he's suited to playing centre-back; to be fair though he sounds alright. On Saturday though, I did notice his subtle change from the familiar "We need to..." to the more detached "Derby County need to..." as Tottenham started to rack the goals up!

August 19th

When Pride Park was built, it was modelled on Middlesbrough's Riverside stadium with a number of minor improvements based on Boro's first year in their new ground. The builders will probably be pleased to know that in a recent survey of Premiership stadiums by the Observer, Pride Park finished one place above the Riverside. Pride Park was 19th and Riverside 20th.

Talking about the Observer, you may have noticed our correspondent featured in The Verdict today. I sorted it out in the week, balancing the chance of appearing in the nations best broadsheet against the fact that our man at the match was doing a Leo Sayer* around London. Thankfully, he delivered the goods. The same man also bumped into Chris Riggott on the train home. Riggott apparently expressed his fondness for the Rams before asking some probing questions about our current defenders- someone tell Billy quick!

*Foreign readers- an "all-dayer". That probably doesn't make sense either- drinking intoxicating liquor for a prolonged period spread across the course of a day.

August 16th

Can you remember Mark de Vries? Just to re-cap: rubbish Dutch striker signed by Leicester during Craig Levein's disastrous tenure. He scored 1 goal in 16 matches during his first season and then 3 league goals the following season. He was then farmed out to Dutch clubs for the next year and a half. Missing presumed dead in the eyes of many. Ok, keep this in mind.

Over the summer Leicester City were the subject of huge changes; a new Chairman, new manager, an injection of cash, high expectations and a teams worth of new players, including strikers Carl Cort and DJ Campbell to add to not-too-bad existing strikers Hume, Fryatt and Hammond. So when the new look, souped-up, sexed-up Foxes took to the field for the first game of the season, who should be leading the line but, you've guessed it, yer man de Vries. For those who missed the result, Leicester failed to score and lost 1-0. At home. To Blackpool.

(post-script- according to Martin Allen, de Vries was glorious on Saturday so I may yet be eating my words).

August 15th

Conversation at work today:

Me: Are you looking forward to Man City tomorrow?

Colleague: Yes. I've got my Amnesty International t-shirt ready.

August 13th

Further observations of the Premiership- the Premiership is above the law when it comes to work permits. At the Home Office it's a case of "Premiership players to the left in the green channel, genocide survivors and Football League wannabe's to the right- red channel".

About this time last year the Rams tried to sign experienced USA international Josh Wolff (48 caps) but were denied as he was a few games, literally a few games, short of the required quota. This season we try to sign Benny Feilhaber (8 caps- well below the quota) and there's no problem. Claude Davis was also short but again- no problem. Man City sign two new players and "neither Bulgarian striker Bojinov, 21, or Croatian defender Corluka, 21, met the strict criteria required." according to the BBC but both played on Saturday.

We also have 5 Nigerian international strikers in the Premiership (Kanu, Yakubu, Utaka, Aghahowa, Martins); either Nigeria play the most attacking formation ever or some of these chaps don't play the required 75% of games. Admittedly not all need a permit* but every game played is one from someone else's quota. I daresay there's other strikers elsewhere in Europe and even Nigeria itself competing for the same places as well.

I've often thought the whole system discriminates against the lower division sides who are barred from signing value players appropriate to their level. The likes of Portsmouth and Bolton can sign any N'Tom, M'Dick or Harridino to sit on the bench for two years whilst the likes of Rochdale, Hereford and Forest are denied signing, for example, a non-international Croat or Ukranian who could play 40 games a season.

*You may remember Yakubu's whirlwind romance and subsequent marriage to a lady of European descent in the weeks between Derby's work permit application for Yakubu being declined and Yakubu signing for Portsmouth with his new European passport. Yakubu went on to score a hatful as Pompey romped to the league title. Derby narrowly avoided relegation before going into receivership. I'm not bitter though.

August 12th

Observations from the first week back in the Premiership:

• Derby are still a low priority on Match Of The Day.
• It is often said about Robert Earnshaw that his contribution amounts to whether he scores or not. He didn't.
• It is true to say that mistakes are very costly in the Premiership.
• Any mention of Andy Todd will also mention his dad. (Remembered by Rams fans over 40 as one of our greatest ever players. Remembered by Rams fans under 40 as one of our worst ever managers).
• A portion of onion rings from Frankie and Benny's (£2.75 for about 8) is daylight robbery. I expected the waitress to serve them with a stocking over her head.
• Even the joy of a late equaliser can be spoilt when someone knocks your Prada shades off in the celebration (I was neither aggressor nor victim by the way).
• Many of Derby's players must live high up in the Peak District judging by some of the all terrain vehicles in the car park. Looking at one particular beast Jackal commented "I half expect the Ant Hill Mob to pile out the back of that". The registration was J8NNO. 

August 9th

I was at a meeting a couple of weeks ago when someone offered to show a video-phone clip of the Play-off final (Why? I don't know but do you need an excuse?) when a young chap piped up with "I hate that team with a passion" Yes, he was a Forest fan (he was there to experience "a meeting". Rule no.1 - Have a good idea of other people's football allegiances before you make a stupid comment like that. Otherwise you may experience unexpected and unexplainable bouts of misfortune during your career e.g. being passed over for promotion in favour of a quiet chap who sits in the corner sipping tea from a Derby County mug). It struck me at the time how little his comment bothered me whereas years ago I would have been fuming.

During the late 80's and 90's, when Forest and us were generally in the same division, the rivalry was always intense whilst Forest had a smug and patronising fondness for Notts County (Notts, meanwhile hated Forest with a passion). Fast forward to pre-season 2007 and most Rams fans viewed the Forest team at the Cloughy match with a mixture of amusement and pity, whilst down the A52 the previous night, Forest and Notts County fans fought on the pitch after a "friendly" between the two clubs (the indignity of it!). Have Forest fans passions re-focussed to a more realistic target?

(The same meeting this week was interrupted by  the Chair's phone ringing- a Casio Keyboard version of Robbie Williams' Angels. I've decided that particular group is not the best use of my time).

August 7th

How about this for damning someone with faint praise? In summarising Richard Jackson's Derby career, the Derby Telegraph, the article alludes to him not being a particularly attacking full-back before adding "[when he did come forward] he showed he could deliver a cross, as we saw in the victory over West Ham United at Upton Park in January 2005." It doesn't flatter Jacko to think that the last time he attacked was two and a half years ago and still sticks in the memory like the sighting of a rare bird!

As rumours circulate that Jonno may be next to leave, the draft copy reads "Johnson was no Franz Beckenbauer but did once successfully pass to the feet of Rams player 15 months ago".

(A more recent sighting of Jacko's attacking prowess was his cross for Howard's header at Cardiff last year. It was also one of his last starts.)

August 5th

The unavoidable question at the moment is- can the Rams survive in the Premiership next season? According to fans of 17 of the 20 Premiership clubs the answer appears to be "no" (survey in the Observer the other three clubs were: Fulham; Chelsea- who nominated 2 plus A N Other; and us).

I don't envy Billy at all though with the transfer market the way it is. The examples are too numerous to mention but the fee's paid for Chopra, Koumas and Kamara, all players who have bombed in the Premiership in the last couple of years are prime examples. An outsider looking at the fee's paid for West Brom players (with Curtis Davies due to leave for around £8 million) might assume that the Baggies are a footballing Harlem Globetrotters, not Championship also-ran's. Let's face it- if they couldn't cause our defence any problems (with due respect a good Championship defence but no more) then I can't see Carvalho or Vidic going off with stress before facing Fulham or Wigan.

So where does that leave us? Sunderland are well on course to spend £20-30m if they close the current deals they're involved in but are only getting crumbs from the Premiership table and don't look much better off to me. I, for one, are pleased we haven't followed this approach. Birmingham have spent less but after the recent farcical episode with Hossam Ghaly and botched attempt to sign Mido, you have to wonder to what degree Bruce's signing's are driven by desperation. (Ghaly turned up for training, thought "these lot are a shower of shit", or the Egyptian equivalent, Brum thought "this guy's a twat" and the whole deal was off. Surely unprecedented?). So far we've avoided both inflated fee's and desperation but for how long? After Billy promised that the squad would soon become unrecognisable, we should be in for an interesting couple of weeks.

August 3rd

A few weeks ago I wondered why on earth Neil Lennon would leave Champions League regulars Celtic, allegedly spurn the Premiership and sign for a lower league East Midlands team. The rumour, according to Radio Derby, is "tens of thousands of pounds a week". Ted McMinn triumphantly added that Lennon's "legs had gone" already (confirmed by others at the match).

Talking of money, it occurred to me that we have reached a point in history (that sounds a bit dramatic doesn't it?) when the cost of a match ticket is the same or less than that of a replica shirt for most games. That's not a dig at the club as I'm sure it's the same all over (fans of London clubs are probably thinking "blimey gav'nor, I can get the whole kit and a track suit"...or more likely..."I say Jeremy these northern oiks etc.") anyway, thinking back to my youth, a shirt would be about three times the price of a ticket (at least 4 or 5 times the price of standing but to labour this point would age me).

August 1st

I've still not been accepted by Craig "single, straight, here for Dating, Seriously relationships" Fagan as a friend on myspace whilst several others have. What have Melisa from Texas, BustyBrooke from Zimbabwe and Exotic Gansta Barbie from Virginia got what I haven't?

There are some football fans though. His latest message reads: "alright fagan you should get back to city you was fuckin ace.every game you always took the piss out of everyone you ran at with the ball.
your a great player".

I can only think he read our site and didn't like it?
 

Journals of Derventio 2006/7 Season